I squeeze smiles out of you!

Monday, January 09, 2006
8:01 pm

If Mariah Carey is vocally the ultimate zenith, then what am I now? This year, I'm gonna chiong all the way up (and down) the octaves! And yes, guitar also, I wanna learn!

Is there anything wrong with devoting an entire day to sleeping? No I don't think so. I feel reborn.

And certain things don't feel settled. And I'm going nuts trying to act like it's all status quo-ish. This blog is a little too inward-focusing for my own good. I feel happy in this solace, an avenue of release, yet there's nothing or no one I'm exactly able to be open with. Or none who's as clear as me about this, if not, wiser. Who understands. This lamentation repeats itself all the time whenever there's a long break from army and I decide to spend it in solitude. An implosion within me resulting from confining myself to staying home. It's not like having outdoor activities or making appointments with friends aren't comforting (they are, but then some ingredients are sorely lacking), and it's not as though I'm whining for a major overhaul in my life.

Wait. Maybe I do need a groundbreaking event happening to me. Everything's too shallow and blind.

This computer's too addictive. This house is waiting to be neatly packed and cleaned. I'm way too passive and unmotivated. Bills and debts are pending for settling. Applications for universities and courses are still in the pipeline. People are needing my quality time; some missing it. God is.

But that's my problem. I'm needed. And I don't feel like letting up.
I'm me. But I shouldn't be all me. I need YOU.

(Excessive sleep. Irregular meals. BLITZ. Hard To Say I'm Sorry, Emotions, phone calls. Break away, I'm still quirky.)

doodled
XD